I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
