fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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