That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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