Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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