Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
