All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
50% drunk capacity currently
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize