Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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