Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
