Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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