what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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