dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Randomize
