she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
