Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
two words: eviction party
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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