Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
a search helicopter?!
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
