dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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