I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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