I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
