fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
