his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
