apparently the secret to your success is patron
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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