It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
