I think I just saw someone hide a body.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize