I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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