your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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