I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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