so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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