i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
