Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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