I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize
