Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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