Just mADE A PArabola og urine
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
