I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize
