I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
