How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
