why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
