Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
