I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
this just has baby written all over it
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
did you just send me my own nude
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
