My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
