Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
