Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
