It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
