Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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