The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
