are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Omg I joined a choir last night...
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
