You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
