But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
