so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
