Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
