whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
