you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
he's gonorrhea incarnate
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
