you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
