That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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